What To Consider Before Filing For Divorce
When faced with a life changing event like a divorce, it is important to take into consideration the possible outcomes and factors at play. It is vital that you look at what to consider before you consider filing divorce. These four questions will help you make the decision on whether you are prepared to file for a divorce.
Have you tried saving this marriage?
Just because you or your spouse may have given up on your relationship does not mean it is past saving. When considering filing for a divorce it is important to take a step back and objectively view if your marriage is irreversibly broken. Many times, looking at your marriage and seeing what has truly broken down can help you fix things that are wrong in not only your relationship but also your personal life.
When you begin to fix things in your own life and your spouse sees that you are happier and doing well it may draw them back in. If they see you are doing better and are willing to give your relationship a second chance than even if they were not willing to work on your relationship beforehand, they may give it a second thought. Even if your marriage is irretrievably broken, just taking the time to better yourself is worth the effort. This will allow you to be a better person in future relationships and be happier overall.
Do you understand the alternative?
This question mostly applies when you have children. Divorce doesn’t fix communication issues with the other parent. Even after your divorce you will be tied to your children’s parents for the rest of their lives. No divorce decree can solve all the issue of co-parenting. For co-parenting to work you must be in agreeance with the other parent on certain aspects of your child’s lives, and not being able to communicate during and after a marriage will make parenting difficult. Divorce does not solve communication issues as parents.
What will your children’s lives look like after your divorce?
This is another important question for parents facing the idea of divorce. While many people think that a divorce will negatively effect children, many times it can be the alternative that has the worse impact. It can be far more harmful for your children to grow up and witness their parents in an unhappy relationship. While it may be initially devastating for children to witness their parents go through a divorce, if it is handled properly and you are civil with one another, your children will realize that the situation is best for everyone. Co-parenting is important in order to make sure your children understand that this situation is okay.
Do you understand the financial conditions of divorce?
The final thing you need to consider when considering filing for divorce you your financial situation. It is important to know where you stand in terms of your marriage’s assets and liabilities. you are unaware of certain liabilities you owe such as a HELOC for example you may be surprised that your equities you can walk away from may be substantially less.
You also need to be aware that if one of the parties is unemployed or was the primary caretaker of the home throughout the marriage that the working spouse’s salary may not be substantial enough to pay for two households. When you divorce in a one income situation you are essentially dividing that income into the maintenance and upkeep of two separate households. While the one income may be divided and dispersed equally by the court it may not be enough for the unemployed spouse to maintain that household.
Going through these questions can help you determine if you are ready to file for a divorce. It can also help you prepare for the process to come and maybe even see your spouses’ side of the situation. While your marriage may not always be savable you can always better yourself and be prepared for the process to come. If you have any questions contact The Law Offices of Michael Kuldiner, P.C. and we will help you through the divorce process or if you are considering divorce.